First Baby, second baby, third baby

My SIL, who has 3 children, gave me a cutting from a newspaper with this title.  It was 2003 and I was pregnant with Jasper who is now 8.   I found it randomly in my address book today, and now I have 2 it did make me chuckle, so I thought I'd share!

Scarlett, 2nd baby, that's OK right?

Maternity clothes
1st Baby:  you begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as it's confirmed you're pregnant.
2nd Baby: you wear your normal clothes for as long as possible.
3rd Baby: your maternity clothes now ARE your  normal clothes.

Preparing for the birth
1st Baby:  you practise your breathing religiously.
2nd Baby: you don't bother because the last time it didn't do a thing.
3rd Baby: you ask for an epidural in your eighth month.

The first clothes
1st Baby:  you pre-wash, colour-coordinate and fold the baby clothes neatly.
2nd Baby: you make sure that the clothes are clean and discard only the ones with the darkest stains.
3rd Baby: boys can wear pink, can't they?

Dummies
1st Baby:  if the dummy falls on the floor you go home to wash and boil it.
2nd Baby: you wash it off with some juice from the baby's bottle.
3rd Baby: you lick it to get the fluff off!

Activities
1st Baby:  you take your infant to Tumble Tots, Baby Swing and Baby Story Hour.
2nd Baby: you take your infant to Tumble Tots.
3rd Baby: you take your infant to the supermarket.

Going out
1st Baby:  the first time you leave your baby you call home five times.
2nd Baby: just before you walk out of the door you remember to  leave the sitter your number.
3rd Baby: instructions to sitter are.....to call you only if she sees blood.

Enjoy!
Annie x